I suck at quitting. If the analogy I was using of cigarettes being dead to me is still being used, then I need to confess my necrophilia. Day one was a Friday, a bitch of a day at work on any normal week. I bought a pack that night. I leaned on the gum hard all day, but I had a super-embarrassing freak out at work and decided that I needed to be kind to myself because my mental health isn’t exactly on-lock right now. So, I’ve had a few over the three days, but nowhere near what I used to smoke. I’m leaning on the gum as I type this and to be honest, it kinda sucks. The gum makes me uncomfortable, though it does take away my desire to smoke. The trade off is worth it, but it just reminds me that this is going to be one annoying ride.
I absent mindedly had a cigarette this morning, so I guess tomorrow will be the next full day without smokes, but I’m really trying to follow the advice of the Jackson 5 here. One bad apple really don’t spoil the whole bunch, girl. I used to be under this mentality that if I slipped up even once in 24 hours, that day was shot, and I might as well behave like I used to. But not today, friend. It’s not even one p.m. as I’m writing this, so there’s plenty of time to not smoke today.
I read this article about drinking a gallon of water every day, and I think I’m going to commit to it. The simple break down by day was enough to make me reconsider my dumb ass ideals. I drive caffeine into me all day long and wonder why my body aches so much, why I have no stamina. So, while I’m not abstaining from my favorite drinks in this time, coffee and the like are big cigarette triggers for me, so I figured it’d be good to drive mainly jut that sweet, H20 into my body for 30 days while I try to kick this nico-habit.
Wish me luck.